Considering a career change after 40, but unsure what comes next? In this episode of Career Change Conversations, Sharlene Lee explores how to move forward without having your whole future mapped out. You’ll reflect on what you want from this stage of life, what role you want work to play, and the next step you can take toward greater clarity.
I’ll walk you through three practical options for beginning when you don’t know exactly what you want next. You’ll also hear why exploring a possibility is not the same as committing to a major change—and why a small step can give you information you can’t get from thinking alone.
In this episode, we’ll explore:
- Why career dissatisfaction may be pointing to something bigger than your job
- How to begin creating a life that aligns with who you are now
- Whether a leave of absence or sabbatical could give you the space you need
- A simple exercise to help you notice the roles and expectations you may be ready to release
- Why trying something you’re curious about can help you learn what fits
- One question to help you choose the best starting point for you
Transcript
Tell me if this sounds familiar. You don’t need convincing that you want something to change, and you’ve started to realize that you want your life to look different, not just your work, but your actual life. But how do you begin when you’re still figuring out what different means? If this sounds like you, stick around.
By the end of this episode, you’ll have three practical potential options for taking a first step towards creating a life and work that reflects who you are now, and a way to choose one of those options without needing your whole future mapped out, because you don’t need the whole plan to take the next step
Hello again, friends. Sharleen Lee here, and you are listening to Career Change Conversations, the podcast for women who have outgrown their careers and are ready to build a life and work that aligns with who you are now. Here, we talk about all of the things related to making that change from the perspective of getting clear about who you are now, what’s important to you, the role you want work to play in the life you desire, and how to reinvent your life in a holistic way.
. Today, friend, I want to help you to get unstuck from the idea that you need the entire plan before you take action towards the life you want. Firstly, when you’re at the point of recognizing that the career you’ve built is no longer what you want, it’s no longer fulfilling, and you’re feeling unsettled or dissatisfied, the career may not be the whole issue.
The bigger issue may be that the life you’ve created no longer aligns with who you are now So when you’re thinking about pivoting, you first need to be clear about who you are and what’s important to you now. Clarity about those things will make it much easier to decide what role you want work to play in the life that you desire.
But I know that thinking about doing something different can bring up a lot of questions. I know that. You know, you don’t know what’s next. You might not even be sure what you want. You just know you don’t want it to continue as you are. And then even if there is something you’re sort of interested in trying, you might be thinking, “Well, what if I try it and I fail?”
Because you’re very good at what you do now, but doing something new might bring up doubts about whether you can actually do this new thing. I know, I know. These are all real thoughts. And the other factor to consider is that you don’t wanna give up the financial security you’ve worked so hard to create.
Those, my friend, are all very real considerations. Today’s episode isn’t about ignoring them. It’s about taking the pressure off of the need to decide immediately with 100% certainty what comes next. Because beginning to explore what you want is not the same as committing to a major change.
So the three suggestions I’m sharing, they’re not steps that you need to follow in order, they’re options. As you listen, consider which one would be most useful for you. Okay, so let’s get into those three options. The first suggestion is to consider a leave of absence or a sabbatical. This is the most substantial of the three options, I’d say, and I know, I understand that it won’t be available or suitable for everyone.
But if it is something you could arrange, it may give you time away without requiring you to resign and make such a big final decision right now. And I know that this is something that many women don’t even think of as they’re navigating this journey of figuring out who they are and what they want next, but for many people, it is actually an option.
The requirements of each case can vary. It matters which country you’re in, what sector you’re working in. I know that tenure, how long you’ve been working there is also a factor. And obviously, there are gonna be stipulations, but it is worth exploring because if you are able to get this time away, you’ll have the time and the space to do the thinking and the exploration to honestly consider what you want next.
With the knowledge that you can go back to work, even if that return to work turns out only to be to complete any required time you need to work before truly resigning, and that’s your option, you’ll also be able to test drive what could life look like without work being the major thing in your life.
Imagine having the opportunity to experience your days differently and live on a different rhythm, you’ll have the freedom to explore other potential options for what you may want to do for work in your next chapter too You know, , in the stress and overwhelm of a career that’s very demanding, and as a high-performing woman, that’s probably your case, this high level of demand and this lack of satisfaction
It can be easy to feel like you just don’t want to work at all, and as lovely as that is, it’s likely not true. You know, most women I speak to on this matter aren’t saying, “I don’t want to work.” They’re saying, “I want to work in a different way. I want to work in a way that life doesn’t consume my work.
I want to work in a way that is fulfilling and matches who I am now.” And even those who think they don’t want to work quickly come to the realization that this is true for them too. They … It’s not that they don’t want to work, they just want to work differently
Practically, this could look like an agreed period away from work with a clear understanding of your finances, benefits, and return arrangements, et cetera. All of those things will need to be ironed out. One important thing here is that it would be very useful for you to define a clear purpose for your time away from work, aside from resting and recuperating, which is of high importance.
I absolutely get that, and I encourage lots of self-care if this is an option that you are considering. During this time, make the most of the time you have to rest and really take care of yourself. Now, having a purpose for your sabbatical or time of extended leave doesn’t mean that you have to have your entire life figured out by the end of the sabbatical.
But the purpose could be something around wanting to get clear about whether you really do want to quit your career, or it could be perhaps intentionally enjoying the things that you currently feel that you’re missing and you want more of in your life. The purpose is up to you, but having a clear purpose for your time away from work will help you to assess its usefulness at the end.
So your first step here could be finding out whether leave is available to you and what the arrangements would involve. Now, remember, friend, that just exploring the option doesn’t commit you to taking it. So you have permission just to explore the idea.
Okay, so that’s the first one done. On to the second. The second suggestion is to deliberately make time to really explore and understand who you are now. I say this because it is very common for women experiencing the desire to leave their career and reinvent their lives to report something along the lines of, “I don’t know who I am anymore.”
- The woman that you were when you began and were building this career that you now have is likely worlds apart from who you are now. And I say this because in our twenties, we view the world very differently to the way we view it in our forties.
Now, you may think, “Uh, of course I know who I am,” and you’re filling the blank with your name, and then you also may be able to explain your responsibilities, your qualifications, your accomplishments, and all of those things without much thought. But describing what matters to you now or what you’re interested in or what your priorities are, what you like or what you want your life to look like might actually include a lot more consideration than you bargained for.
And that’s the work we’re talking about here , and this is the work that I do with women in my Identity Reset program. In considering who you are now, getting clear about roles and titles that no longer serve you, getting clear about who you want to be in your next chapter, your core values, your boundaries, your priorities around health and wellness and capacity and relationships, and everything holistic is required before you can really make an informed decision about the role that you want work to play in your new chapter
Now, once you’re clear about these things, about your identity now, this serves as the filter that all decisions will have to pass through. And friend, if it doesn’t align with the woman you are or who you desire to be, then it’s probably not a good fit. And that works for most decisions, not just about the work that you will eventually do.
So as a practical first step, something that you could do would be to, and it’s quite simple, list all of the names, the titles, the roles you’ve been given, and that you’ve given yourself, both positive and negative. This is gonna be an honest reflection. For example, you may be wife, mother, caregiver, hard worker, problem solver, divorced, provider, the strong one, the dependable one, a perfectionist.
Write them all down, friend. Don’t hold back, and take a good look at that list. And then I want you to cross out all of the ones that no longer serve you or the ones that you don’t want. This, my friend, will help you to see how much you’ve been carrying that is no longer aligned with who you have become or where you want to go.
Once you’ve cleared the way by eradicating all the things that you don’t want anymore, you now have the space to really think about who you are now or who you desire to be. Keep the ones from the original list that you do want and then add to it. This, my friend, is a really good first step towards some meaningful identity work.
Okay, so we’ve had consider a sabbatical or a leave of absence, and then number two was to take time to explore who you are now and do that work of identity. On to the third. The third one is to choose something that you’re curious about and simply give yourself an opportunity to experience it.
Friend, it doesn’t have to become your next profession. It doesn’t need to earn you money. You can be interested in something without knowing what place it will have in your future. I love to say, and I probably say this too often, but I’m saying it again, that you don’t have to have a marriage mentality about everything you try.
And there are two benefits that I really want to draw out about trying something in this open way. First, when you actually try something rather than just imagining it, you get information you couldn’t get from imagining alone. You find out what the experience is actually like because I know, and I’m sure you’ve experienced this yourself, that the idea of a thing is quite different to actually doing the thing.
Second, it gives you an opportunity to reconsider assumptions about yourself. So for example, something you thought, “Ah, it’s not really my thing,” might turn out to be enjoyable or something you imagined loving might not interest you after all.
Let’s say you’ve been curious about photography or even learning how to code. Let’s look at those examples. You could attend just one beginner’s workshop in either of those things rather than going all in and doing a paid certification and deciding that you want this thing to become a major part of your life.
Afterwards, you’ve dipped your toes in, you’ve sampled it, you might realize using the photography example as an example, you may find that you actually really enjoyed being outdoors and paying attention to things that you probably wouldn’t pay attention to because you’re photographing them.
Or in the example of coding, maybe you will realize
that this is a way that you could utilize your skill of problem-solving in a completely different way that you had never considered before.
You may also decide that whatever it is that you try isn’t for you, and that’s absolutely fine. Either way, you do have something to work with.
And so the question isn’t, Have I found my new direction? Is this it?” It’s more about, “What did this experience help me notice?” Trust me when I say that the process of deciding what you want to do is just that, it’s a process, and you gather information along the way. And because you’ve chosen one manageable experience, you haven’t had to make a large commitment of time, finances, and explaining to everyone why you’ve tried something, and talking it up so much, and it’s resulted in not anything that people can see.
You don’t have any of those things because you’re just taking a small step to gather some information. So at the beginning of this episode, friend, I promised you three practical options for beginning to create a life that reflects who you are now and a way to choose one without needing your whole future mapped out.
We’ve looked at three ways to begin, a leave of absence or a sabbatical, which could create some space outside of your normal working routine,. We also looked at taking time to explore your identity and who you are now, so that you can understand what matters to you, which will in turn help you to make decisions about what you want in the next chapter you’re creating.
And finally, we explored the idea of trying something you’re curious about to give you an experience to learn from, rather than expecting yourself to figure everything out in advance. Now, friend, you do not need to do all three. Now, you can if your life, time, finances, everything allows.
But that’s probably not the case for everyone. So to choose one, ask yourself this: What would be most useful to me now? Some space, a better understanding of myself, or an experience I can learn from? Then, friend, go make it practical. If it’s space, your next step might be finding out what leave is available.
If it’s self-understanding, it might be setting aside some time to explore what matters to you now and who you are now. And if it’s experience, it might be booking a class or arranging one activity that you’ve been curious about. That’s your starting point, not a decision about your entire future. One realistic step that you can discover more about the life that you want.
Now, friend, if you are realizing that what you need first is a clearer understanding of who you are now, I welcome you to book a clarity call with me. It’s a zero pressure call, no hard sell, just to determine where you are and what you most need to help you begin your journey of creating a life and work that align with who you are now.
, This call would be good for you if any of these things are true for you.
Perhaps you know what you don’t want, but you haven’t had the space to consider really what your priorities are right now. Or perhaps you can see that some things have changed, but you’re finding it difficult to put that into words. We can talk about what you’re hoping to get clearer about and whether coaching could support you in that exploration.
Friend, this certainly is not about me telling you which career to choose. It’s actually about helping you to understand yourself so that you can begin creating a life that aligns with who you are now. You’ll find the link to book a clarity call in the show notes. As always, thank you so much for giving me your ear and spending some time with me today, and I will see you in the next episode